Awake...

when u suddenly wake up from a dream, you first start from a blur, because you've been asleep for a period of time and you need some pause to bring yourself back to reality. It's like you've removed yourself from a "subconscious" world and "come back" to some reality. The dream world is probably something like a bubble of your own subconscious. You might say that you live in your own world. People don't really exist because they just are not there. They are only there in reality.

But somehow that dream world is like a winter wonderland. You can imagine what you want. You can think what you like. You can eat, do, sleep, dance and do whatever you want. Its basically what its called - a dreamworld. And then, ironically you have to wake up to reality. A place where you're not the only one that counts. A place where there are...other matters. And somehow other matters normally outweigh the dreams that you wish to happen. We all have our dreams, but not all of them become reality. That is a fact that everyone has to accept.

Just that sometimes it happens suddenly, and it slams you in the face.

I just realized i probably have been living a dream for the past nearly 22 years of my life. I woke up from that dream 4 years ago. I've been in that blur for 4 years. Now i'm probably awake. I think i've finally managed to realize what i want. What i really want and not what i dream. I'm an idealist, but i need to be practical as well. I wish i never woke up from my dream. I wish i could have stayed under. Because now, i really have a problem. How do i tell everyone else that i've woken up from my dreams and realized i'm a totally different person? How do i tell everyone else, that what i want is not the same as everyone expects of me? How do i tell everyone else, that i don't want to be the person they hoped i would be or could be?

How do i tell everyone, that i just want to be...me?